WE’RE ADOPTING!!!!! After all of the pain and loss of miscarriage, we are so excited to be growing our family in a different, but oh so special, way.
We started dating at just 15 and 16 years old after being introduced by my cousin. We lived in different states- I was in California and he was in Washington- but despite the difficulties associated with a long distance relationship, our love continued to grow. We attended college together at Washington State University and were married at City Hall the day before we graduated and the morning Jared commissioned in the US Army. Three days later we drove to our first duty station and his army career (and our married life) officially began.
After several years of enjoying our lives just the two of us (plus our two sweet pups we rescued during that time), we decided we wanted to have children. A 9 month deployment later we started trying and were blessed to become pregnant just a few months later. In April of 2017, at 14 weeks pregnant, we lost our little boy, Ellis Ford. Since then we have lost three more babies- Baby Pea in August of 2017, Little Bean in April 2018, and our baby girl, Faith, in October 2018. It was immediately following the loss of Baby Faith that we both felt the Lord calling us to adoption in such an obvious and irrefutable way. And, thanks to the miraculous way He opened our hearts and minds to this different way of growing our family, we surrendered to His plan and jumped in with both feet!
Despite it holding a special place in our hearts, adoption was never something we thought we’d pursue. We had our first conversation about adoption after our second loss, but we just weren’t ready to truly entertain the idea because we still believed we could and would have biological children. When we struggled to get pregnant the third time, we started discussing becoming foster parents. And while this plan didn’t work out, I think it was entertaining the idea of being foster parents that started to open our minds and hearts to other ways of building a family.
It wasn’t until after the loss of our fourth baby, Faith, that we decided to pursue adoption though. I can’t even explain exactly what happened when we came home from the ultrasound appointment that revealed that Faith had already gone to be with Jesus. It’s all kind of a blur. All I know is that, in the same moment, Jared and I both knew adoption was our next step.
After a lot of research, immersing myself in the adoption community on Instagram, discussing things with my best friend who is adopted, and then of course relaying everything I was learning to Jared, we decided to pursue our adoption journey with Faithful Adoption Consultants. We are in the home study process now through Abiding Love Adoptions and are working on our profile book with Kindred + Co in the hopes that we can become an active family in the next couple of months.
Our Heart for Adoption
Adoption was not always a part of our plan. We came to it after a lot of pain and heartbreak. But we have come to see adoption as the beautiful merging of families that it can be.
For us, adoption is not just a solution to our struggles with miscarriage. It’s not Plan B because Plan A failed. It is a calling. We believe that throughout our struggles to grow our family, with every loss and heartbreak along the way, God was preparing our hearts and opening our minds to adoption. Adoption is His plan for our family.
Adoption also isn’t just about us getting a baby. Yes, we are so hoping to bring a baby into our family. But, we are also hoping to bring our baby’s first family into our family as well. We hope that through open adoption, our child can have a special relationship with their birth family that will allow them to know where they came from and that they are deeply loved by so many people.
We know that adoption comes with unique challenges, but we are prepared (with the Lord’s help and the support of our wonderful friends and family) to meet those challenges head on. Being parents to our future child will be such an incredible privilege, one we know will test and shape us, but also open us up to so much joy and new depths of love I can’t even fathom right now.
Help Support Us
Adoption is expensive….like, incredibly so (the average is about $40,000, but it can exceed $50,000). But we refuse to let the high cost get in the way of God’s plan for our family. So we’re humbly asking for your support and trusting that God will provide! If you have connected with us in any way through my sharing our story, I hope you’ll consider supporting us, whether that’s through prayer, helpful advice, or financially through supporting our fundraiser.
In order to raise money to fund our adoption, and relieve some of the financial pressure so we can love the expectant mother and her baby that we get matched with well, we’re selling these T-shirts that my wonderfully talented friend designed for us. Our adoption fundraiser will run from January 3rd until January 23rd. At the end of the three weeks, all the shirts will be printed and shipped out directly from Bonfire.